STOP IT ED!

Dont open the refrigerator, you already looked in there. She didn’t buy anything new, the only food you want in there is left over dinner, you want ALL OF IT. You want to binge on it until your so full you can barley see straight and then stagger over to the bathroom toilet and purge until your completely numb. IM NOT LISTENING TO YOU TODAY ED. im working with Barbara again, the nutritionist you hate. Im trying really hard to follow her meal plan. I know we hate to follow it. i know it makes us think were fat. ED i dont want to break up with you yet, i still love you. i love all the time weve spent together. All the nights weve binged and purged. The many times weve gone for weeks without eating ..watching those numbers drop on the scale was like watching a sunrise after a brutal storm. But i have a nicer boyfriend EDward..and a family..and friends…and they dont like you ED. If I don’t start to separate myself from you…im going to have to go away again. the place where they made me the “F” word..you know that word…you call me the “F” word all the time. You did it to me last night after my shower. FUCK YOU ED! i did so well with my meal plan, and then you made me stand naked and circle in magic marker all the parts of my body you thought i should fix. your such a burden ED! i want to do so much with my life, and im just carrying you around on my back..waiting for you to tell me what to eat ..what to wear..when to go out..what to think of myself..IM SICK OF IT…

…i want to break up

its not me

its you ED